How to Sell on Craigslist > Best of the Best of Craigslist Funny Ads

Best of the Best of Craigslist Funny Ads

Most of my website is about selling on Craigslist, but there are some great areas of Craigslist that can be very entertaining to read.

The funniest area is the best of Craigslist. Below are a few of my favorite recent hilarious posts, along with other random funny ads I’ve seen.

Horse in a hotel

Hi. My friend would really like to meet the person who snuck this horse into a hotel. Was it you? Was it your friend? Let me know if you have any info!

craigslist horse hotel

Here is the full picture of the horse in a hotel. Awesome:

horse in a hotel room

Free mug to “Fred”

Large glass mug with “Fred” etched into it. Free to anybody named Fred. Photo identification is required.

craigslist free fred mug

Full Fred mug photo:

fred mug

Possibly in Need of Exorcist

So my boyfriend is buying a house on Wednesday. An old house. Built in the ’40s. And I firmly believe it’s haunted. Like ghosts and sh$$ just flying out of the walls.

So in the event we walk in there and find out there’s some Omen-level sh** going down, I need to have the number of a good exorcist. References required.

craigslist exorcist

I had to read this next one a few times to figure out what the hell was going on. Sounds like a very romantic missed connection:

You may of been my true-love-prince! – w4m

I, was wearing purple polka-dotted crotchless panties, yellow fuzzy tap dancing shoes and rainbow knee-high socks with swirly peace signs. On my tits, I had disco pasties. I have sicc multi-colored dreads.

You, had a green goatee, and no pants. A cow patterned blazer, No shirt. Sicc tatts.

I saw you hula’n on the multi-colored flying dragon art-car as I was riding my TIGHT cruzer thru da sicc playa dust.

We made eye-contact and never saw each again! Hope the universe brings us together. Namaste.

P.s. my name is Raven.

p.p.s we saw each other at burning man.

craigslist missed connections w4m

Here is the last of my favorite recent best-of-craigslist posts. A shrine to Morrissey. Really…

Morrissey shrine

My unemployment benefits ran out and I have to downsize, so I won’t be able to take the shrine with me. No more reeling around the fountain, indeed. Comes from a home where smoking was previously allowed and 2 cats lived but they both died this summer. And I might as well tell you that I had to exchange all the stuff my ex-fiancee and I had at each other’s places this morning, since he ended our relationship just as things were looking most grim for me, so I might be sobbing when you come by.

craigslist morrissey shrine

And here is the full photo of this woman’s Morrissey shrine. I can’t believe her fiancee ended their relationship…

morrissey shrine

More Odd, Interesting, And Funny Ads Posted On Craigslist

Here you go. More Craigslist craziness.

pac n play

This portable Pac N Play crib looks more like a body bag. It also comes with extra sheets, just in case you make a huge, bloody mess.

training toilet photo


I’m sorry, but even for a bargain, I would not want to buy a used training toilet, no mater how clean it is or how rarely it was supposedly used.

breast pump photo

Just like used toilets, if I was ever in the market for a breast pump, Craigslist would definitely not be the first place I would check. I like how it “has only been used twice”. Surprisingly, this wasn’t the only used breast pump listed in this city.

I am pretty sure woman can get new breast pumps for free, too.

kids desk pic

Now this just looks scary. The light on that desk looks like it is coming straight from Hell… “just has some crayon marks on it.”  Yeah, thanks a lot, Damien.  “Can not deliver” because the owner is Satan himself.

trampoline pic

That looks totally safe. It just needs one major piece and a couple of minor parts.

Best Of Craigslist

Here are some original “best of craigslist” posts. The first best-of post goes back to August 14, 2000.

This section includes a snippet of the funny Craigslist ad with a link to the original post if you want to see the whole post. These can get weird.

Ladies – Babies – Les Femmes Sans Bras!

Originally Posted: 2000-08-14

Bonjour Babies,

So what’s the deal – I write you lyrical poetry defining my needs in the woman
I want to grace with my potent seed – and no responses – I even took out all
the cuss words an sh*t. Babies – we ain’t got no time for no woo-ing – we live
in a binary digital age – I’m a Child of the cold war, babies… we could all
go up in any second – Mushroom clouding – surfin on those radioactive waves up
to St. Peter’s Pearly Barbed Wire fence – and wouldn’t purgatory be so much
more fun with the warm thoughts of me inside you still keeping you warm?


Ladies – Foxies – N’Oublierez Jamais Boire Ma Tete!

Originally Posted: 2000-08-15

Bonjour Babies,

Beautiful Babies – you make my heart heavy. All I want is to share my sweet hot
lovin with one, two or more of you – and still you don’t reply! Babies – I
knowz your out there staring at the monitor – maybe fantsizin about what I
looks like nekkid – the moonlight bouncing off my dark hairy skin… my silk
tiger print boxers… pulled taught by the passions of the night … yeah


The Blonde Driving in Colma

Originally Posted: 2001-03-01

You were the blonde who was driving slowly in that long line of cars in Colma yesterday. It was only 1pm, but your lights were on. Actually all the cars in front of you and behind you had their lights on as well, so I guess you all must have just come out of tunnel or something. I was the guy who drove past you in the 1974 Ford Pinto with the personalized license plate that read NO BRAIN. It was actually supposed to read NOV RAIN, meaning ?November Rain? for that way cool Guns ‘N Roses song that came out a few years back, but I had a really bad head cold the day I went to the DMV and I guess NOV RAIN sounded like NO BRAIN.



Originally Posted: 2001-06-25

adapt-o-bot at your services.
running low on cash? take the shelves out of
your big closet and call it a room..
ask $1600 for it and claim that if I pay less,
you wouldn’t be able to live there.

no problem.
culturally adaptive,
fully modular unit.


A Public Service Annoucement From Your Kidney

Originally Posted: 2001-07-17

Hi there,

This is your kidney speaking. I know we haven’t communicated in awhile, what with you being all busy at work and stuff, but I’ve been trying to send messages your way that I haven’t been feeling too good. I’m glad that somebody finally forced you to go to the doctor to get me all fixed up, because I was thisclose to just giving up and is this the way we really wanted to go anyways? I hope you realize now that people care about you and that if you did die all alone in your apartment, it wouldn’t be weeks until someone found your dessicated corpse. (More like days, I’m sure.) Please take care of me, and let me rest for awhile. Sit in bed, watch TV, let your mind rot, not your kidney.


You crushed my house, but looked good doing it

Originally Posted: 2001-07-17

You: Cute boy in the giant robot chasing strange extra-terrestrial beings. Me: Girl cooking fakin’bacon when your robot’s foot came through the roof of my apartment. I think you broke my toe, but I also think we made a serious connection.



I hope you enjoyed this list of the best posts on Craigslist. I know I definitely enjoyed putting it together! I think Craigslist is a really great resource for finding things, and I hope you found this list funny.

If you didn’t find what you were looking for on this list of funny Craigslist ads, don’t worry! There are plenty of other great posts out there on Craigslist I will find and add to this list. I encourage you to keep exploring and see what else you can find. Who knows, you might just find your own favorite “best of” post.

Do you like this collection of old Craigslist posts? Leave a comment below!

Also See These Helpful Tips When Searching Craigslist

Search All of Craigslist

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